


SBORG

by gelema



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Asexual Character, Bisexual Character, Multi, Original Character(s), SBURB Fan Session, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-18
Updated: 2015-05-20
Packaged: 2018-03-31 03:49:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3963319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gelema/pseuds/gelema
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the universe created by John Egbert and his friends, Gray Mucha and his friends get ready to play the newest version of the game: SBORG.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Gray Mucha

**Author's Note:**

> I had this idea a few days ago, and I'm excited to finally get it out there. The writing style right now resembles early Homestuck: it just goes on with as little preparation as necessary. I hope you enjoy it :)

A young man stands in his room. It just so happens that today, the 29th of May, 2015, is this young man’s birthday. Though it was eighteen years ago this man was given life, it was only five years ago that he received a name, due to mysterious meta doings. 

Your name is GRAY MUCHA. 

You have a strong fondness for ALL THINGS SWEET and will PRACTICALLY DEVOUR any dessert set before you. You are a PROGRAMMING GENIUS (at least, that’s what you like to believe). You have only learned ONE PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE and have a very limited knowledge beyond the basics, but you LOVE THE ACTIVITY nevertheless. You live in a CABIN in RURAL AMERICA with your OLDER SISTER. Although you bear all of the traits of an AVID GAMER – namely NERDINESS and a LOVE OF STORYTELLING – you do not consider yourself a member of the HIGHLY ESTEEMED GAMER LEAGUE. You have been preparing to play SBORG since you were THIRTEEN YEARS OLD, but have yet to begin the game! As with most things, you have been an EXTREME PROCRASTINATOR. 

Your room is looking SOMEWHAT STERILE at the moment. You suppose you will have to remedy that by leaving your DIRTY PAJAMAS on the floor. They mingle pleasantly with the absurd MESS OF PAPERS already tossed down. On the wall is a CURRENT CALENDAR with today’s date circled for your BIRTHDAY. Somewhere on a LONG_FORGOTTEN CALENDAR today’s date is circled to mark both your BIRTHDAY and the release of the SBORG game. An ELECTRIC PIANO is set up at the foot of your BORING BED. Your COMPUTER is on top of your DESK amid lots of other STUFF. 

What will you do? ==> GRAY: Put your pajamas in your drawer. 

You hold up your pajamas and consider tidying your room for a spell, but ultimately decide not to do so. 

While you are holding your pajamas up, you decide to admire them. They are gold, which coincidentally is the color of the icon on your shirt. Your icon is a rabbit, and the rabbit icon is also on your pajama bottoms in white. You love rabbits. 

After gazing for a while, you drop your pajamas back onto the floor where they belong. 

==> GRAY: Examine papers. 

You pick up a jumbled stack of paper and- 

Oh, this will not do at all. 

You sit yourself down on the ground right there and start sorting the stack into two piles, specifically “Important paper” and “Unimportant paper”. In ten minutes, after you have sorted all of the paper on the floor, you leave a neat stack of important papers on the carpet beside your bed, and the unimportant papers you toss onto your pillow. To remind you to throw them away later. 

==> GRAY: Check computer. 

You check your computer. One of your chums is online, and is sending you a message through Pesterchum. You open up the new message. 

Pesterlog

\--  legerDemain [LD] began pestering  citadelOverseer [CO] at 13:21 --

LD: hey Gray happy birthday!

CO: Aww thanks!

LD: has it been a good birthday so far?

CO: Sure, I suppose. I just woke up. :P

LD: jeez i can’t believe you slept in so late on such an important day.

CO: Neither can I, actually. I really wanted to get this game started as soon as possible.

LD: yeah you should definitely get around to that. once you’re ready, i can connect to you, okay?

CO: Great.

==> GRAY: Find the game. 

The game has been sitting on the highly esteemed space on top of your desk. Anything that is put here is automatically important, if only because it is safe from being stepped on. 

You toss a pile of dirty clothes and candy wrappers onto the floor and pick up Sbir- Oh, god damn it. You accidentally ended up captchaloguing the game. In return, your cell phone falls out. It only took about four months to get that back, which is not the worst record you’ve had to deal with. You learned years ago to pick things up carefully so as not to lose them in your confusing sylladex, but every now and then it slips your mind.

==> GRAY: Examine Sylladex. 

A sylladex is a shit thing, and you know it. Granted, your feelings stem almost entirely from the impracticality of your PRISON MODUS. Whenever a new item is placed in your sylladex, it is locked up and will only be returned when proper payment is given – usually requiring another input of something with equal value. The modus tends to sense changes in the value of locked items, and adjusts payment accordingly, which has caused terrible events to occur such as the time when... You’d rather not talk about it, actually. 

Regardless, the prison modus is now demanding that you give it your favorite stuffed rabbit, which you’ve had since you were a baby, in exchange for the game. You know it’s the reasonable thing to do but... you can’t just lock up Fluffy like that. You would never get any more cuddles! 

==> GRAY: Give LD the bad news. 

Pesterlog

CO: Yeah, so playing the game isn’t going to work.

LD: you did something awful with your stupid modus again didn’t you?

CO: Of course I did.

CO: There’s no way in hell I’m going to give up Fluffy.

CO: Is there any way you can give me a digital copy of your game?

LD: i just ran it through some software.

LD: the securities and anti-piracy shit are super tough on this game.

CO: Ugh!

LD: just don’t sit around moping about it, okay. you already slept in today.

CO: I mean, duh. I’ll do something. I just don’t know what.

LD: you can ask your sister what to do?

CO: ...

CO: Sure, that sounds like fun!

==> GRAY: Exit your bedroom. 

You walk out of your room and are immediately facing the door to your sister’s room. You aren’t sure if she’s inside or not, and you don’t want to be caught snooping if she’s not there. 

==> GRAY: Listen through the door for noises. 

You press your ear to the door and... you determine that your sister is not there. It’s too quiet in there. 

You suppose you could have figured that out by the sound of bass-amplified rap music coming from the kitchen around the corner. You shrug. 

==> GRAY: Go around the corner into the kitchen. 

You round the corner and find your sister making a steaming cup of Ramen noodles for herself. She basically lives off of this stuff – this, and Nutella. But not together! 

==> GRAY: Discuss situation with sister. 

You tell your sister about your current predicament. She tells you to throw the dumb bunny in there and be done with it. You argue with her. You tell her how important the bunny is to you. She complains about the last time you refused to trade in the bunny. 

You both bicker for quite some time. 

At the end of the discussion, you have to face the fact that you need to captchalogue the rabbit. However, you’re going to not do that for as long as possible. 

==> GRAY: Go back to your room. 

You are back in your room, and there is a new message on your computer. 

Pesterlog

\--  vaporCarnality [VC] began pestering  citadelOverseer [CO] at 13:26 --

VC: Dude.

VC: Just checked the comet tracker thing.

VC: You have like 30 mins until you get blown sky high.

VC: What are you waiting for?

VC: Dude?

VC: If LD isn’t connecting with you, then you can connect with me.

VC: That would be cool, buddy.

VC: Are you there?

==> GRAY: Respond to chum. 

Pesterlog

CO: No, it’s not her. I got the game stuck in my sylladex, and it wants me to captchalogue Fluffy.

VC: Fucking do it.

VC: I don’t have the patience for you to sit there feeling sorry for your stuffed rabbit.

CO: Well fuck me if you aren’t even bossier than my bossy-ass sister.

VC: I am your bossy-ass sister B)

CO: Hah. Okay, I’m doing it, hold on.

==> GRAY: Tearfully captchalogue Fluffy. 

With a heavy heart, you lean back in your chair toward the bed and reach for your dear friend. Your hand slowly closes the gap between you and the beloved furry. Slowly closing the gap on poor Fluffy’s material world. 

You pause to sigh and think about the past. 

==> GRAY: Sigh and think about the past. 

It was five years ago when you first became truly conscious of the world. Five years ago when you rushed outside to the mailbox to retrieve your SBORG copy. Five years since you looked into the sky and realized that your life... fucking sucks. 

You have no friends who you can see in real life. You sit on your computer all day talking to the people you love the most in the world, but don’t even know what they look like. You and you sister never knew a parent’s love – a fact which you now understand was somehow caused by playing the game SBORG. 

You truly believe that your greatest comfort through all of this has been your happy rabbit familiar. His cute beady eyes and 3-shaped smile give you joy. What a shame that his existence is now going to be within the confines of your terrible modus. You extend your reach when suddenly...! 

A stranger is outside your window knocking to be let in! 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Gray meets the stranger, walks around his house while important things happen, and talks to his friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's so confusing to have different plot ideas all twisted up in your head :P I'm doing my best to make it sound clear in writing. I just wanted to say, I'm highly inexperienced at writing, so any and all critiques (excluding critiques which are actually just people being rude) are happily accepted!

==> Gray: Let the stranger in.

In your surprise, you fall backwards in your chair and hit the floor. Jolted finally into complete-awakeness, you scramble around on your back like a bug that was cruelly flipped over. When you finally manage to get up on your knees, you lift the window and let the stranger in.

==> Gray: Find out who this strange person is.

Dialoglog

GRAY: Um... Hi there?

STRGER: hello! are you getting ready to start playing the game right now?

GRAY: Well, yeah. I was about to captchalogue my rabbit Fluffy.

STRGER: oh...kay?

GRAY: I need to do that to get the game out of my sylladex.

STRGER: ah, i get it. but you don’t need to do that, actually!

GRAY: What do you mean?

STRGER: i brought a modus along with me. it’s for you.

==> Gray: Accept modus.

It’s a Topsy-Turvy Modus Card. You’ve heard about this disaster. It generates a list of items in your sylladex every time you ask to retrieve from it, and it will keep giving you the least helpful thing possible until you run out of everything else in your sylladex.

You don’t see how this could possibly be an improvement.

Luckily for you, it looks like the stranger is going to explain himself.

==> Gray: Listen to explanation.

Dialoglog

STRGER: if you combine the modus you have with this one, then it will as for the opposite value in order to get an item. so if you need something really important then it will ask for a stupid exchange, like a hair clip or something.

GRAY: Oh wow! This is great!

GRAY: Thank you, complete stranger!

STRGER: oh jegus, i haven’t introduced myself.

STRGER: i'm john.

GRAY: I’m Gray. I guess I’ll get around to getting the game now.

JOHN: wait!!

JOHN: you’ll also need this.

==> Gray: Retrieve item from John.

He hands you a brass pole with a knob on both ends. You have no idea what this is for.

==> Gray: Find out what this is for.

Dialoglog

GRAY: Um...

JOHN: well your house is strangely lacking any weaponizable objects.

JOHN: its a scepter. are you okay with this being your strifekind?

GRAY: I suppose so. Like you said, there’s not anything else I could use.

JOHN: okay great! having a weapon isn’t really important right now, but it’s pretty important.

JOHN: probably more important than a stuffed rabbit even.

==> GRAY: Check sylladex jail.

You check your sylladex and realize that the value of the game has been adjusted to match the value of the scepter instead of Fluffy. What a lucky break! You captchalogue the card without a second thought and the game is expelled.

==> GRAY: Run the game with LD.

Pesterlog

CO: I’m running the game now.

LD: finally. slowpoke.

CO: Hey now.

CO: It says it’s running.

LD: okay, i'm attempting to connect now.

LD: yup, connection secured.

LD: um, who is that in your room with you?

CO: What? Oh, right, you can see my house on your screen now.

CO: He says his name is John. He appeared outside of my window and helped me get the game from my sylladex.

LD: he *appeared* outside your window?

CO: I think he’s alright.

LD: well at least he’s helping you out. it would have taken us another ten minutes for you to get the game on your own.

CO: Ugh, rude.

LD: you should talk to “John” and see what he wants with you.

LD: i'll be busy setting up things for the game.

CO: Okay.

==> GRAY: Talk to “John”.

Dialoglog

GRAY: So, John.

GRAY: Are you here to help me play the game or something? How do you even know about SBORG?

JOHN: i played it once with my friends, a previous version back when it was called SBURB.

GRAY: Oh... Oooh! That’s so cool!

GRAY: You’re like an experienced vet or something.

JOHN: i suppose so, though to be fair our session was riddled with tons of glitches. it wasn’t anything like a normal game usually goes.

GRAY: Wow, you managed to play the game with glitches and still survive? Are you super high-leveled now?

JOHN: i was, but ... i stopped using my powers once we finished so that i could try to be normal again.

GRAY: Did it work- FUCK WHAT WAS THAT?

JOHN: that was just your server player setting down some of the equipment for the game.

GRAY: It shook the whole house!

==> Gray: Go examine the equipment.

You step outside of your room to find this mysterious game equipment, and realize that the first large piece had been snugly fit in your hallway. The sides were short enough that you could crawl over the edges of it, but a large column-shaped part was very tall in the middle.

It took you a moment to realize that it had been placed directly in front of your sister’s door.

Pesterlog

LD: this is the Cruxtruder. activating it is one of the first steps to getting in the game.

CO: Argh! Why would you put this thing in front of my sister’s door? She’s going to be so mad at me.

LD: aw shit i didn’t notice that.

CO: Can you move it?

LD: no i need the rest of the grist to set down the other items. you really don’t have a lot to start off with.

LD: fuck fuck fuck

CO: I just hope she doesn’t need anything from inside anytime soon.

LD: ...

CO: Oh no...

LD: yeah, she’s trapped inside.

==> Gray: Express anger.

You take a deep breath and calmly change your pesterchum mood to rancorous.

Pesterlog

LD: :(

==> Gray: Move on to the living room.

You are nearly surprised to find that the next item is being neatly placed along the wall. It’s just such a convenient location for a huge, long object to be placed, and she even managed to not knock the portraits your sister had framed years ago off the walls. Beneath your bad mood, you secretly applaud LD.

==> Gray: Find out what this contraption does.

Dialoglog

GRAY: So John.

JOHN: um, yeah?

GRAY: The Crux thingy begins the game, so what does this do?

JOHN: this is the totem lathe. it carves things into blocks of cruxite.

JOHN: and the cruxtruder doesn’t actually begin the game, it just reveals the countdown. it also gives you your kernelsprite and makes cruxite.

JOHN: oh, speaking of that, what are you going to prototype?

GRAY: I don’t really know. I’ll just let it happen however.

JOHN: paradox space always seems to have a purpose for things happening the way they do, or at least they did in our session. i'm sure there’s something planned that will be prototyped for you.

JOHN: just remember to use something you actually like. one of my friends prototyped a sick misogynist puppet in an offshoot timeline, and i think that version of him had some unresolved issues that were related to his mistake.

JOHN: and he then he became a bird, and his issues got worse.

JOHN: it was really sad, actually, even though he acted like he was too cool.

GRAY: That sounds really sad.

JOHN: hey, weren’t you going to get back to your friend with the pink kind of text?

GRAY: He says it’s “berry” :P But yeah, I should do that.

==> Gray: Talk to VC.

Pesterlog

CO: Hey there.

CO: Things ended up turning around and I didn’t have to captchalogue Fluffy after all.

VC: Oh well I’m glad you learned exactly zero lessons then, but you have the game now and have a chance of actually making it into the medium alive.

VC: That’s good.

CO: Thanks!

CO: The comet is like 25 minutes away from me right now, correct?

VC: Um... No???

VC: It’s a hella lot closer than that man.

CO: WHAT??

CO: You told me I had thirty minutes!

VC: Oh hahah. I meant thirteen.

CO: How close is it?

VC: You have under ten minutes right now. You should probably begin the timer on the Cruxtruder so you can actually see how much time you have.

VC: I only have a rough estimate.

CO: Okay then I’ll tell LD to

CO: Oh fuck dangit

VC: What?

CO: My sister just found out she’s trapped in her room.

VC: Nice.

CO: I have to go help her now. Bye!

VC: Wait no Gray.

VC: You need to begin the process.

VC: Get back here!

VC: Omgyoustupidkidhowareyouevenstillalive

==> Gray: Go help sister.

She’s beating on her door and yelling your name. Why is it she already thinks you’re involved? Sometimes it’s like she has a sixth sense which she exclusively and only ever keeps trained on you.

She asks you what the hell do you think you’re doing to her door. You tell her this is part of the game and then facepalm because that sounded stupid. She tells you it’s not a freaking game and she wants to wash up because she just finished staining some wood and she smells awful. You tell her you can’t do anything. She says she really doesn’t want to have to hack through the door with a handsaw. You tell her that’s a great idea, and then fall on top of the Cruxtruder when another large drop shakes the house.

LD is pestering you.

==> Gray: Reply to chum.

Pesterlog

LD: there wasn’t a lot of room anywhere else in your house, so i expanded the kitchen and put the last thing there.

CO: That’s fine. I’m just glad my house isn’t falling apart right now, actually.

CO: My sister is going to saw her way out of the door.

LD: dang. she is just. So. Bad. Ass.

LD: honestly, your sister is the coolest person i know, don’t tell DD i said that.

CO: Thanks :)

CO: If this was a ploy to make me stop being mad at you, I appreciate how thoughtful of a ploy it was.

==> Gray: Change pesterchum mood back to happy.

You do so and feel better. You sit back and smile.

Dialoglog

JOHN: i’m going to go ahead and begin the countdown, if you don’t mind.

GRAY: That actually sounds like a really good idea. Go ahead.

JOHN: watch your head.

==> Gray: Watch your head.

You move out of the way as a large and brightly-colored hammer appears in John’s hands. He throws his arms back with the hammer and swings it forward with a huge amount of force onto the top of the Cruxtruder. You gawk at his display of power. It is wholly and utterly awesome.

A flashing kernelsprite appears near the ceiling over your head, and the top of the Cruxtruder is now open. A timer which was thankfully placed on the side facing you rather than against a wall reads out the time: 1:21.

Is that in minutes...?

It changes to: 1:20. And then to: 1:19.

**_OH SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!_**


End file.
